Monday, August 31, 2015

KIRK VAN HOUTEN
“Can I Borrow a Feeling”
(UnfortunateFace)


'

When asked by a New York Times interviewer in 1923, “Why did you want to climb Mount Everest?,” British mountain climber George Mallory famously responded, “Because it’s there.” Now, I’m no hero, but I feel this morsel of cassette release-age is Himalayan in its importance (and absurdity). I proudly place myself in the shoes of trailblazing visionaries everywhere by bringing you this, the actual, physical artifact of Kirk van Houten’s “Can I Borrow a Feeling” demo tape. Why? Because it’s there, of course! We thought it was lost, crushed beneath the wheels of a convertible, but here it is, in its true glory. This relic will make you laugh, cry, swoon, and fall in love all over again. Don’t know it? Take my hand with your glove of love and read UnfortunateFace’s description for yourself. There’s no need for me to even review it!

Have you ever been dumped by some girl who is so stupid that they can't even draw a simple thing like dignity? Have you ever slept in a race car bed and had people not be incredibly impressed by it? If so, you need this Can I Borrow a Feeling cassette demo tape by Kirk Van Houten. It will make feel a million times better and you won't constantly think about how you just got fired from your sweet job at the cracker factory! 100% handmade with love, sweat and tears from an actual drawing (not a screengrab). Comes with case, tape and sweet insert, printed on super high quality Canon Luster paper. Tape color will vary, but every insert will be the same. I am not responsible if your decision to purchase this tears your marriage apart.”

Hurtin’ hearts need some healin’, everybody. Hurtin’ hearts need some healin’.


--Ryan Masteller



2 comments:

  1. So is this unlicensed Simpsons memorabilia, an actual album, or both?

    ReplyDelete
  2. Seems like unlicensed Simpsons memorabilia to me! I though it was funny.
    --Ryan

    ReplyDelete