The way
Cassette Gods works is that labels and artists from all over inundate a central
office with their tape mailings, in the hopes of showcasing their music through
the magic of journalistic acrobatics. Once the lovingly packaged music is
ripped open by the mailroom ogre, the tapes are heaved onto an ever-growing
mountain, and a handful are selected here and there by unfathomable bipeds and
periodically sent to the intrepid writers.* Your tape might be reviewed by the
excellent Jacob An Kittenplan, or maybe the renowned Roy Blumenfeld, or
possibly the magical Adam Padavano. If you’re really lucky, your tape will be
sent to me.
Three Fourths
Tigers, this is your lucky day.
Weird thing,
though, is that I also run a little old blog called THE CRITICAL MASSES (all
caps today for some reason), so there’s a small chance that I’ll have already
received and reviewed your release for that site. In this instance, Three
Fourths Tigers, this is not your lucky day, because I already reviewed this
tape for the ol’ CM. Or wait – maybe it is
your lucky day because we all get to relive that excellent initial review!
Yeah, I’ll go with that one. So without further ado, and again in all caps
because this is my thing, I bring you:
THREE FOURTHS TIGERS: INDOOR VOICE – REVIEWED ON THE CRITICAL MASSES!
THREE FOURTHS TIGERS: INDOOR VOICE – REVIEWED ON THE CRITICAL MASSES!
You guys are
really gonna love it if you haven’t seen it before. Here are some snippets:
“Indoor Voice is jam packed with burbly clusters and
taffy-stretched tone, synthesizers roiling through landscapes like magic mist
and causing new and interesting flora and fauna to spring forth from the earth
in a neon glaze of demonstrative glory.”
“In truth, Indoor Voice plays like the soundtrack
to Earth of the future, the post-first-contact, post-terraforming,
post-ESP-evolution Earth where human beings no longer look human (to our eyes),
so we drop the ‘human’ and simply refer to them as ‘beings.’”
“[F]ortunately, the confines
of Earth no longer bind us, and we’re able to treat visitors from other
planets, like those arriving in ‘Other Landings,’ with the dignity and respect
they deserve, not with a tense military show of force. You’ve seen Mars Attacks! right? Yeah, not like
that.”
Consider your whistles
wetted! Get on over there, you scamps.
*This probably isn’t how the Cassette Gods office really works.
Probably.
Field Hymns
Three Fourths Tigers
--Ryan Masteller
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