“A Kiss is the Beginning of Cannibalism” C23
(Broad Beauty Tapes)

I haven’t had to write a shitty review in a while and was really looking forward to listening to this tape with “left-field” written all-the-fuck-over-it. Futuristic graphics and heavily-loaded bandname? Check. Macabre album title and blackmetal-reminiscent song titles? Check. Weird, cozy-ish knit jacket? Check.

“You should never judge a book by it’s cover,” Spake the cult leader.

This is the same straight-forward techno you’ve always heard whenever the main character walked past the bouncer and into a sweaty nightclub. Save yourself some dough and hold a thrift store tape recorder up to the television’s speaker and record that scene a few times instead; with any luck, your annoying sibling/roommate will make some ambient noise that might add something worth listening to. I, myself, listened to this tape at least a half-dozen times and could for the life of me find anything warranting its existence. Sorry.


- - Jacob An Kittenplan