CHECK ENGINE PALACE “Untitled Release” C28 (Endangered Species Tapes)

I leave Pennsylvania, and they start in with the tape labels. Well hey, PA, I ain’t coming back. I’ve left. I’m gone. You had your chance – for, like, decades – and now I’m out. Your wicked musical cassettes can’t entice me to return!

But this isn’t about me and my Pennsylvanian regret. This is about Doug Polgardy and HIS Pennsylvanian regret! Probably. Allentown’s Endangered Species Tapes certainly isn’t NOT enabling him here, and just because I was born in Allentown Hospital doesn’t give them a free pass to ratchet up the existential angst of an Eastern PA existence. What DOES give everybody a free pass to do everything pretty much however the heck they want is the droning tonal torture Polgardy’s inflicting on us, an aural waterboarding that actually leaves you begging for more waterboarding! Not sure how that metaphor works, but bear with me … or don’t, it’s up to you. What I can tell you is this: Check Engine Palace knows how to get under your skin with a fairly minimal palette, and it’s not really the aural equivalent of waterboarding but more of someone gently chiseling at your face.

And you’re a T-800 Terminator in this scenario.

These five tracks glow like nefarious radiation leaks. Prepare accordingly and enjoy liberally.