PEPPER MILL RONDO “It’s Christmas Time!” (Hausu Mountain)

Hi! Real quick, because you guys are probably chugging nog in your pajamas and gathering around the fireplace or the television yule log on your favorite streaming service, but did you know that Pepper Mill Rondo has your holiday spirit COVERED for you today? That’s right, the Hausu Mountain boys Doug and Max have whirled together another sampledelic masterpiece, the successor to the bafflingly great E.D.M., this one a Christmas-themed ride called, appropriately, It’s Christmas Time!

Right? Everybody good?

Good, because this one was also recorded with a karaoke machine, and it’s a whipped slurry of samples coming at you so fast from both speakers that you won’t be sure if this is actually a Christmas tape or a sign of the apocalypse. So why not both? The spirit of the season certainly has a slightly different flavor this year, if you ask me.

It’s Christmas Time! fully comes across as if Doug and Max have thrown a ton of VHS tapes into the old wood chipper out back and painstakingly tried to splice the reels back together to get something usable. Did they succeed? The result is certainly usable, although it in no way resembles the original sources. Which is what makes this a perfect addition to your family’s holiday traditions, even though it essentially takes a nuclear warhead to them.

On second thought, don’t let your kids near Pepper Mill Rondo. They’ll have nightmares for weeks.

OK, back to your holiday traditions! Why are you checking your phone today anyway?